Prelude Melodia Africana I by Ludovico Einaudi
Opening Words by Andy Pakula
Come into this circle of community. Come into this sacred space.
Be not tentative. Bring your whole self!
Bring the joy that makes your heart sing.
Bring your kindness and your compassion.
Bring also your sorrow, your pain.
Bring your brokenness and your disappointments.
Spirit of love and mystery; help us to recognize the spark of the divine that resides within each of us.
May we know the joy of wholeness.
May we know the joy of being together.
Chalice Lighting (you may wish to light a candle in your own home at this point). Words by Julie Nedin
Let this be a light of welcome, of hope and of joy.
You may have had a busy day – you are here.
You may have had a quiet day – you are here.
You may have had a difficult week – you are here.
You may have faced challenges – you are here.
You are here, bring joy or sadness.
Be calm in this moment.
May you find the power in this space to meet concerns head on,
or to feel the freedom to leave them at the door.
Bring yourself to this time of worship, be you, with us in peace and love.
Opening Prayer
Spirit of Life and Love,
Be with us as we gather for worship,
Each in our own place.
Help us to feel a sense of community,
Even though we are physically apart.
Help us to care for each other,
In this world in which
the clouds of war and climate change hover.
May we keep in touch however we can,
And help each other, however we may.
Help us to be grateful for the freedoms we have
and to respect the wishes of others.
May we hold in our hearts all those
Who are grieving, lost, alone,
Suffering in any way,
Amen
Reading from The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran
Then a woman said, Speak to us of Joy and Sorrow.
And he answered:
Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.
And the self-same well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.
And how else can it be?
The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.
Is not the cup that holds your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter’s oven?
And is not the lute that soothes your spirit the very wood that was hollowed with knives?
When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy.
When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.
Some of you say, “Joy is greater than sorrow,” and others say,
“Nay, sorrow is the greater.”
But I say unto you, they are inseparable.
Together they come, and when one sits along with you at your board, remember that the other one is asleep upon your bed.
Verily you are suspended like scales between your sorrow and your joy.
Only when you are empty are you at standstill and balanced.
When the treasure-keeper lifts you to weigh his gold and his silver, needs must your joy or your sorrow rise or fall.
Alternative Lord’s Prayer
Spirit of Life and Love, here and everywhere,
May we be aware of your presence in our lives.
May our world be blessed.
May our daily needs be met,
And may our shortcomings be forgiven,
As we forgive those of others.
Give us the strength to resist wrong-doing,
The inspiration and guidance to do right,
And the wisdom to know the difference.
We are your hands in the world; help us to grow.
May we have compassion for all living beings,
And receive whatever life brings,
With courage and trust. Amen
Reading from Deep is the Hunger: Meditations for Apostles of Sensitiveness by Howard Thurman
There are some who are dependent upon the mood of others for their happiness…. There are some whose joy is dependent upon circumstances…. There are some who must win their joy against high odds, squeeze it out of the arid ground of their living or wrest it from the stubborn sadness of circumstance…. There are still others who find their joy deep in the heart of their religious experience. It is not related to, dependent upon, or derived from, any circumstances or conditions in the midst of which they must live. It is a joy independent of all vicissitudes. There is a strange quality of awe in their joy, that is but a reflection of the deep calm water of the spirit out of which it comes. It is primarily a discovery of the soul, when God makes known [God’s] presence, where there are no words, no outward song, only the Divine Movement. This is the joy that the world cannot give. This is the joy that keeps watch against all the emissaries of sadness of mind and weariness of soul. This is the joy that comforts and is the companion, as we walk even through the valley of the shadow of death.
Prayer by Alex Brianson
Spirit of Life, you who animate the Universe
Help us to remember the gift that is a human life.
With our consciousness and senses, we can touch, taste, see and feel
So much that is good, and alluring, and enticing.
Spirit of Life, some of us here today may be thinking of concerns more than joys,
Of loss rather than enjoyment.
For those of us, we ask for healing and restoration.
To those of us, we pledge our aid.
Just as cares arise, so shall they pass.
Just as grief pains, new joy beckons.
Spirit of Life, may we remember that life is a dance.
And may we ensure that we move to the rhythm divine.
So may it be. Amen.
Reading from Following Jesus: Finding Our Way Home in an Age of Anxiety by Henri Nouwen
Joy is a gift that is there even when we are sorrowful, even when we are in pain, even when things are difficult in our lives….
What we have to start sensing is that in the spiritual life, joy is embracing sorrow and happiness, pain and pleasure. It is deeper, fuller. It is more. It is something that remains with us. It is something of God that is very profound. It is something we can experience even when we are in touch with very painful things in our lives. If there is anything the church wants to teach us, it is that the joy of God can be with us always – in moments of sickness, in moments of health, in moments of success, in moments of failure, in moments of birth, in moments of death. The joy of God is never going to leave us…
When we can face our own painful situation, we will discover that hidden in the pain is the treasure—a joy that is there for us to experience here and now. It is very important that we get in touch with this. That is what the spiritual life—the life with God—is about. It is being in touch with that love that becomes joy in us…. Underneath all our fluctuations is a deep solid divine stream that is called joy.
Time of Stillness and Reflection words by Alison Thursfield from With Heart and Mind
How am I travelling my life’s path?
Remembering any setbacks or troubles,
can I accept such things,
pick myself up and carry on?
Am I aware of people around me
trying to cope with their problems?
Am I ready to turn aside like a ‘good Samaritan’
if I see another who has suffered a setback
and who needs my loving support?
My times of joy uplift me and fill me with happiness
and I give thanks.
But can I share such times
without boasting of my good fortune?
Can I enjoy another’s happiness without envy?
Am I courageous enough to think about my end,
and contemplate how I spend my waiting time?
[silence]
May I give thanks for the gift of life,
and accept with equanimity
all that I encounter on my path.
I would trust the guidance of the indwelling Spirit at all times.
Musical Interlude I Giorni by Ludovico Einaudi
Address What is the Source of Your Joy?
Joy and sorrow. There has been such lots of both around in the last few months. If I had been delivering this service to a live congregation in a church or chapel, I would have included Candles of Joy and Concern somewhere in the service. Because at the moment, there is so much to be sorrowful about and, paradoxically, so much to be joyful about too.
I totally understand Kahlil Gibran’s Prophet, when he says, “the self-same well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears…. The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.” Because joy and sorrow are the deepest feelings that human beings can have, and I truly believe that it is not possible to experience either deeply, unless we allow ourselves to be vulnerable and open to whatever life throws our way; all its joys, all its sorrows. If we choose to numb our responses to life, because we are scared of being too sorrowful, that we won’t cope with the despair, the disappointment, the loss, the grief; we are also numbing ourselves to the possibility of feeling deep joy. And that is truly sad.
Each person’s life is a rich tapestry of joys interwoven with sorrows. I do believe that they are inseparable, and that to feel one, you have to be open to feeling the other. Like the Prophet says, “Together they come, and when one sits along with you at your board, remember that the other one is asleep upon your bed.”
Having the capacity to feel great joy and great sorrow also means that we have the capacity to love greatly. Which is surely a gift? We are living in difficult times, with terrible news breaking daily, whether it is Donald Trump bombing Iran, people starving in Gaza (and in so many other places), or the myriad species of plants and animals dying out because of our lack of care for our world.
Each death diminishes our world. Each time I hear about the death of someone else, whether known to me or unknown, I remember that each person was an individual, with parents, a partner, children, friends, who will grieve his or her passing. And I think of the words of John Donne,
“No man is an island, entire of itself;
every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main.
If a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe is the less,
as well as if a promontory were,
as well as if a manor of thy friend’s or of thine own were:
any man’s death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind,
and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.”
Each person has left an indelible mark on the world, by the simple fact of having lived. And that is surely an occasion for joy. So many of the funerals I have conducted have been “A celebration of the life of…”. And people have laughed and cried, shed tears and shared memories. Which is how it should be.
I love Howard Thurman’s explanation of the deep joy which comes from within us, which is not dependent on circumstances and outside events for its existence. As he says, “It is not related to, dependent upon, or derived from, any circumstances or conditions in the midst of which they must live. It is a joy independent of all vicissitudes. There is a strange quality of awe in their joy, that is but a reflection of the deep calm water of the spirit out of which it comes. It is primarily a discovery of the soul, when God makes known [God’s] presence, where there are no words, no outward song, only the Divine Movement. This is the joy that the world cannot give. This is the joy that keeps watch against all the emissaries of sadness of mind and weariness of soul. This is the joy that comforts and is the companion, as we walk even through the valley of the shadow of death.”
This, I believe, is the kind of joy we need to cultivate, to hold onto, in these desperate days. Otherwise, I fear, we will become overwhelmed with sorrow about the sad events going on all around us.
If I may give you a personal example. The other day, Maz and I went out for a walk around the fields which surround our village. The weather was beautiful, Summer was showing herself everywhere, in the ditches and the hedgerows and the fields themselves. We saw a red kite wheeling overhead, riding the thermals with such grace and majesty, and heard the pure song of a skylark. It was just gorgeous, and my heart was full of joy.
Then I came home and logged on to Facebook, to find that a dear friend had died in hospital. My bubble of joy burst, and I was filled with sorrow by the news of their passing.
And yet, the fact that I had been open to the joy of the surrounding natural world helped me to be able to cope with the sorrow I felt. Without the one, the other would have hit me a lot harder.
For me, the key to my source of joy is the practice of gratitude. Brené Brown has much to say about the benefits of gratitude. She writes, in The Gifts of Imperfection, “We need both happiness and joy… But in addition to creating happiness in our lives, I’ve learned that we need to cultivate the spiritual practices that lead to joyfulness, especially gratitude. In my own life, I’d like to experience more happiness, but I want to live from a place of gratitude and joy.”
I believe that, as the German humourist, poet, illustrator and painter, Wilhelm Busch once wrote, “a joyful life is made up of joyful moments gracefully strung together by trust, gratitude, inspiration and faith.” Which is why one of my spiritual practices is an evening gratitude practice – under the heading of ‘Small Pleasures’, I record in my journal at least three things which have made me feel grateful that day. They can be tiny things, such as “both journeys accomplished without traffic delays”, or huge things, like the births of my two grandsons. Or regular quiet pleasures, like “nice, relaxing evening with Maz, Luna (our cat) and crochet”.
I truly believe that because I record these small pleasures every day, I have some ammunition to overcome the feelings of dread and fear. And that conversely, if I did not have a daily gratitude practice, I believe it would be only too easy to get lost in the negativity, thus causing myself unnecessary suffering.
Yet, to become aware of the sources of joy and sorrow in our lives, we need to be willing to be open, vulnerable, to go deep. Which can feel difficult, if not impossible, at times. But as Henri Nouwen explains, “in the spiritual life, joy is embracing sorrow and happiness, pain and pleasure. It is deeper, fuller. It is more. It is something that remains with us. It is something of God that is very profound. It is something we can experience even when we are in touch with very painful things in our lives. If there is anything the church wants to teach us, it is that the joy of God can be with us always – in moments of sickness, in moments of health, in moments of success, in moments of failure, in moments of birth, in moments of death. The joy of God is never going to leave us…”
I do believe that if we live our lives vulnerably, at a deep, spiritual level, we become more resilient to sorrow, as we are more open to joy. The advice given by the great Sufi poet, Rumi, in his wonderful poem The Guesthouse, can help us here. When I first came across it, some years ago, it puzzled me enormously. Why on earth should I “welcome difficulty”?
But I have discovered that if we are to live our lives fully, feeling every emotion, every joy, every sorrow, we will be incomparably richer thereby. I will finish by sharing the first two verses of that poem…
“This being human is a guesthouse
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
Some momentary awareness
Comes as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and attend them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
Who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture,
Still, treat each guest honourably.
He may be clearing you out for some new delight.”
In spite of the sorrows and griefs of this time, may we all come through it safely, and be cleared out for some new delight. And may we stand up for what we believe in and play our parts in fighting for the rights of others to be joyful too, with enough food to eat, water to drink, shelter, and all the other things which make all of our lives not only bearable, but joyful.
May it be so, Amen
Closing Words
Spirit of Life and Love,
May we learn to live our lives
From a place of gratitude,
So that the deep joy may make us more resilient
To the many sorrows in the world.
May we play our part in relieving the sorrows of others.
May we return to our everyday world refreshed,
may we share the love we feel,
may we look out for each other,
and may we keep up our hearts,
now and in the days to come, Amen
Postlude Stella del Mattino by Ludovico Einaudi