Prelude Melodia Africana I by Ludovico Einaudi
Opening Words by Marie Penn
Enter this house of worship – feel the peace,
Warming our thoughts and feelings, bringing us grace;
Giving ourselves to worship, music and praise;
Gath’ring with friends, together our voices to raise.
Bring to this house of worship, love and joy,
Finding the power within us – words to employ;
Sharing our thoughts and feelings, caring and balm;
Hoping to pass to others, quiet and calm.
Take from this house of worship, love and peace,
Leaving behind our problems, feeling at ease;
Facing the coming future – looking to light,
Glowing with care and wonder – joy and delight.
Joy and delight.
Chalice Lighting (you may wish to light a candle in your own home at this point). Words by Julie Nedin
Let this be a light of welcome, of hope and of joy.
You may have had a busy day – you are here.
You may have had a quiet day – you are here.
You may have had a difficult week – you are here.
You may have faced challenges – you are here.
You are here, bring joy or sadness.
Be calm in this moment.
May you find the power in this space to meet concerns head on,
or to feel the freedom to leave them at the door.
Bring yourself to this time of worship,
be you, with us in peace and love.
Amen
Opening Prayer
Spirit of Life and Love,
be with us as we gather for worship,
each in our own place.
Help us to feel a sense of community,
even though we are physically apart.
Help us to care for each other,
in this world in which the clouds
of war, poverty, and climate change hover,
and help us to make a difference,
starting where we are, with what we have.
May we keep in touch however we can,
and help each other, however we may.
May we be grateful for the freedoms we have
and respect the wishes of others.
May we hold in our hearts all those
who are grieving, lost, alone,
victims of violence and war,
suffering in any way,
Amen
Reading from Embodied Joy by Barbara A. Holmes
Joy is a choice. Our lives are so short; to live with joy seems to be a no-brainer. Why waste time on issues that we can’t control? Your body holds memories of both joyful and difficult moments in your life. Think about something that made you angry, and your body will supply the distress and angst to go with the memory. Think about joy and happy moments in your life, and your whole body smiles. Joy offers a peace that surpasses all understanding. Once you experience joy, once you find those inner pathways, it leaves markers toward those inner resources so that you never lose sight of them again…
So, how do we foster embodied presence and joy? I believe we do it through practice and through meditation. Left to your own devices, the natural state of the human brain is a wandering and critical mind. Meditation helps bring that chaos into a more peaceful state. If it’s difficult, begin with sitting in silence. Let your mind do what it wants before slowly bringing it into the present moment. Use music if it helps.
The second thing I would suggest is to awaken to the joy in nature. Purposely pay attention to sunsets and sunrises, to the sounds of nature, and other expressions of joy in the environment. Third, I would suggest that you develop an appreciation for the everyday graces, the sound of children playing, the traffic that won’t let us get home when we want to, but allows a pause in our frenetic going.
Alternative Lord’s Prayer
Spirit of Life and Love, here and everywhere,
may we be aware of your presence in our lives.
May our world be blessed.
May our daily needs be met,
and may our shortcomings be forgiven,
as we forgive those of others.
Give us the strength to resist wrong-doing,
the inspiration and guidance to do right,
and the wisdom to know the difference.
We are your hands in the world; help us to grow.
May we have compassion for all living beings,
and receive whatever life brings,
with courage and trust. Amen
Reading from Embodied Joy by Barbara A. Holmes
Fourth, I would suggest that we begin to ritualize transitions, such as births and deaths, transitions from child to teenager, and from teen to adult. Mark these events as special moments of joy. You may be surprised at the numbers of incidents of joy during the ritualization of sad occasions. As Thich Nhat Hanh says, “Be peace.” I’m suggesting that we “Be Joy.” You may not feel it, but embody it. Live it. Smile it. Is that being fake? I don’t think so. I think it’s holding space for the joy already given and received that you may not be aware of yet. It’s helping your body to express an inner state of being.
Finally, don’t forget the power of community to create spaces of joy when you cannot engender the joy yourself. That joy comes during worship, during fellowship, and even during crisis. Civil rights workers found their joy in music as they came together. I’ve always said, the greatest antidote to depression and oppression is joy. There’s joy in coming together of one accord. …
When you feel alone, look at those who are with you in the struggle, and those who have gone before. No matter the circumstances, it was community that empowered the justice movements in this country and in others. It was a momentum of like minds focused and trusting in God that gave activists the energy to face their fears.
Prayer by Alex Brianson
Spirit of Life, you who animate the Universe
Help us to remember the gift that is a human life.
With our consciousness and senses, we can touch, taste, see and feel
So much that is good, and alluring, and enticing.
Spirit of Life, some of us here today may be thinking of concerns more than joys,
Of loss rather than enjoyment.
For those of us, we ask for healing and restoration.
To those of us, we pledge our aid.
Just as cares arise, so shall they pass.
Just as grief pains, new joy beckons.
Spirit of Life, may we remember that life is a dance.
And may we ensure that we move to the rhythm divine.
So may it be. Amen.
Reading by Cliff Reed
“Thank you for the days, those endless days,
those sacred days you gave me.”
– ‘Days’, The Kinks (1968)
Thank you for the days that are gone:
for the days of hope,
for the days of resolution to save the world,
when, by striving, we’d make it true.
Thank you for the beauty.
Thank you for the singing.
Thank you for the dancing and the joy that
we shared.
Thank you for the love that held us
and for the Spirit that filled us.
Thank you for the loving and the
magical, tender nights.
Thank you for the days that are gone,
and for the people who are gone,
those who cared for us and influenced us
for the good.
Thank you for today,
for this present moment of possibility.
Thank you for the days to come,
the days to fill with striving and with hope,
with joy, with beauty and with love.
May it be so.
Time of Stillness and Reflection by Laura Dobson
(The New Economics Foundation created The Five Ways to Well-being in 2008 – as a set of evidence-based actions that promote well-being in everyday life. These are: Connect, Be Active, Take Notice, Learn and Develop, and Give.)
Breathing in, I connect.
Breathing out, I am aware of my connections.
Breathing in, I am aware of my connections with family and friends, with ancestors, with the people in this community, with all people in all times and places.
Breathing out, I am aware of my connections with the myriad creatures who inhabit my body and keep it functioning.
Breathing in, I am aware of my connections with the plants and animals that provide me with food, with companionship, with beauty and joy.
Breathing out, I am aware of my connections with the earth, the tides of the moon, the light and warmth of the sun.
Breathing in, I am aware of my connection to my higher self.
Breathing out, I am aware of my connection to that which I experience as sacred or divine.
Breathing in, I am active.
Breathing out, I am aware of my activity.
Breathing in, I am aware of the activity of my body digesting its food.
Breathing out, I am aware of the actions of my heart pumping blood to all parts of my body, supplying my cells with oxygen.
Breathing in, I am aware of the activity of the synapses of my brain, creating thoughts.
Breathing out, I am aware of the actions of my lungs, breathing.
Breathing in, I take notice.
Breathing out, I am aware of my noticing.
Breathing in, I am aware of the sensations of my body touching the chair and my feet touching the floor.
Breathing out, I am aware of the temperature in the room, how the air feels.
Breathing in, I am aware of how the energy feels in this space.
Breathing out, I am aware of my own presence in the world.
Breathing in, I learn.
Breathing out, I am aware of my learning.
Breathing in, I am aware that even in this very moment, I am learning something new about myself.
Breathing out, I am aware that in every interaction I learn something new about others.
Breathing in, I am aware I am always learning about Life.
Breathing out, I am aware I am always learning about the Source of Life.
Breathing in, I give.
Breathing out, I am aware of my giving.
Breathing in, I am aware of the time and energy I give to myself.
Breathing out, I am aware of the time and energy I give to others.
Breathing in, I am aware of the care and attention I give to myself.
Breathing out, I am aware of the care and attention I give to others.
Breathing in, I am aware of the love I give to myself.
Breathing out, I am aware of the love I give to others.
May our daily breathing be a reminder to connect, be active, take notice, learn, and give. Amen
Musical Interlude Melodia Africana III by Ludovico Einaudi
Address Pathways to Joy
My favourite sociologist, Brené Brown, has some interesting things to say about joy, and about the differences between happiness and joy. She explains that “Happiness is attached to external situations and events and seems to ebb and flow as those circumstances come and go. Joy seems to be constantly tethered to our hearts by spirit and gratitude. But our actual experiences of joy – these intense feelings of deep spiritual connection and pleasure – seize us in a very vulnerable way…. In addition to creating happiness in our lives, I’ve learned that we need to cultivate the spiritual practices that lead to joyfulness, especially gratitude.”
Yet she also warns that the vulnerability of allowing ourselves to feel joy can also lead to great fear of loss. She calls this “foreboding joy”. Which happens when we feel immensely joyful about something and then immediately imagine something bad happening. She gives the example of standing over her daughter, watching her sleep, “feeling totally engulfed in gratitude, then being ripped out of that joy and gratitude by images of something bad happening to her.” This comes from being afraid to lose what we love the most, having no guarantees that loss will not happen.
She says, “We think not being grateful and not feeling joy will make it hurt less. We think if we can beat vulnerability to the punch by imaging loss, we’ll suffer less. We’re wrong. There is one guarantee: If we’re not practicing gratitude and allowing ourselves to know joy, we are missing out on the two things that will actually sustain us during the inevitable hard times.”
The trick of gratitude, I have found, is sacred living – weaving moments of attention into our lives, so that we are aware of all the lovely things happening around us. As I have said before, through sacred living, we will come to realise that God’s grace is everywhere. Sacred living is about living with a new level of awareness. It is about going through our days paying attention to what is happening at each passing moment. It is about noticing the presence of the divine, the numinous, everywhere: in the natural world, in other people, in ourselves and in our experiences. Sacred living is about rediscovering our sense of wonder, and living our lives in response to that. Sacred living is about truly appreciating what we have. Being grateful for it.
At the end of each day, before I go to bed, I record at least three “small pleasures” I have experienced during the day (and sometimes, HUGE ones). I have found that this practice has exponentially increased my general level of happiness. Even when I’ve had a fairly rubbish day, I can still be grateful for having got through it… And on less good days, I sometimes read back through old ‘small pleasures’ to remind myself how very lucky and blessed I am.
Yet as we have seen in our readings and prayers today, gratitude is not the only way to cultivate joy in our lives. I loved Barbara Holmes’ reflection on embodying joy, which made up our first two readings. First, she explains that “Joy is a choice … [that it] offers a peace that surpasses all understanding. Once you experience joy, once you find those inner pathways, it leaves markers toward those inner resources so that you never lose sight of them again…”
She then lists various pathways to joy, including meditation, which helps to calm our “wandering and critical minds”, and “helps bring that chaos into a more peaceful state.” She advises, “If it’s difficult, begin with sitting in silence. Let your mind do what it wants before slow bringing it into the present moment.” Something like the beautiful words of Laura Dobson, which formed our Time of Stillness and Reflection, might help too.
Her second method of awakening joy is to pay attention to the joy in nature. Sometimes, if I am feeling down, the only thing I need to do is to take a walk around our village, or up in to the Forest, with my eyes and ears open to the beauty around me. It never fails to lift my spirits. She also suggests developing “an appreciation for the everyday graces”, which is very similar to my daily gratitude practice, which I mentioned earlier.
Her fourth pathway is that “we begin to ritualize transitions, such as births and deaths, transitions from child to teenager, and from teen to adult. Mark these events as special moments of joy.” I also think that taking joy in the ordinary days too is important. I mentioned sacred living earlier. I think that this is also about going through each normal day, paying attention to what is happening in each passing moment. Now. And now. And now. It is about noticing the presence of the divine, the numinous, everywhere: in the natural world, in other people, in ourselves, and in things that happen to us. Then, as Mary Jean Irion prays, “Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are. Let me learn from you, love you, savour you, before you depart. Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow.”
Because today is all we have. Today is the only place in which time touches eternity. I love the Sanskrit affirmation, “Look to this day – For it is life, the very life of life. In its brief course lie all the verities and realities of your existence: the bliss of growth, the glory of action, the splendour of beauty. For yesterday is but a dream, and tomorrow is only a vision, but today well-lived makes every yesterday a dream of happiness and every tomorrow a vision of hope. Look well, therefore, to this day.”
Finally, Holmes reminds us of “the power of community to create spaces of joy” when we cannot engender the joy for ourselves. She says, “That joy comes during worship, during fellowship, and even during crisis. Civil rights workers found their joy in music as they came together. I’ve always said, the greatest antidote to depression and oppression is joy. There’s joy in coming together of one accord. …”
We are all members of many communities: our families, our friends, our work colleagues, perhaps sports or hobby groups and, of course, our congregations. Each of these communities provides a space to come together in fellowship, and find common ground, common humanity.
I also believe that the vast majority of people do this thing called “life” better, and more successfully, if we learn from others, if we live our lives in community. Which is why being part of a Unitarian community is so important – we may each be on slightly different paths, following different sources of insight and inspiration, but we know that there are other people along the way, who can help and support us. I’d like to share the words of Sue Ayer’s beautiful prayer, “Let this be a place not only of searching, but of discovery. Let this be a place not only of learning, but of wisdom. Let this be a place not only of meeting, but of connection.”
Speaking personally, I know I would not be the Sue Woolley I am today, had it not been for the generous, empathic, gentle input from family, friends and mentors along the way. I would have become mired in my sadness and loss and been unable to climb out and move on. For me and, I guess, for most of us, life is a journey best taken in company. And I also think it is easier to experience joy in community with others – it can be infectious.
To conclude, I believe that the good company of others is essential for our life’s journey, so that we can learn to grow into our best selves. We need to have open minds and open hearts, so that we can receive insights and wisdom from our fellow pilgrims. But we also need to have the individual courage to take the first steps, and some trust that we will get there in the end. Life is a journey of discovery and connection, of ups and downs, of times of wonderful joy and deepest despair. But if we can find the good company of some fellow travellers with whom to share the experience, it is always, always worth taking a risk and diving deep into the river of life. There will be joy to find and experience along the way.
Closing Words
Spirit of Life and Love,
Our time together is drawing to a close.
May we learn how to be open and trusting
in our lives, that we may experience the joys
all around us. And share these joys with
our nearest and dearest, and with the wider world.
May we return to our everyday world refreshed,
may we share the love we feel,
may we look out for each other,
and may we keep up our hearts,
now and in the days to come.
Amen
Postlude Stella del Mattino by Ludovico Einaudi